Rishikesh, 15 augustus

Hi there my sweet readers,

I'm writing you from the internet cafe on the ground floor of the hotel I'm staying at in Rishikesh. It's only 150 irs a night,so I can afford to hang here a little longer and upload pics on FB. The pic upload on Flickr is an issue: it is gonna take at least four hours to get the 800 pics that I took so far uploaded. And I don't see me sit here for four hours in a row. I'll probably get another disc burnt, although I really think putting them online is so much safer.. and it's kindov urgent since my memory card is full. Anyway, instead of bugging you guys with the technical troubles,I should tell you some more about the ashram.

Some highlights.

Mataji's cooking workshops: she showed us how to cook sattvic food. The first time she did some curries, the second time she made four different kinds of sweets. Awesome! Awen is sending me the pics once she's online.

Meditation in Swami Vishnu devananda's cave in Gangautri. The energy level was soaring. It made me cry (again, man am I having fun here!!) and I had some me-time on a big rock in the Ganges, sunbathing and emptying my head. Bliss.

The puja for Sarasvati. The Satsang Hall looked beautiful. A centre row of oil lamps, flamked by two rows of pillows for all of us. We offered Merigold flowers, rice and red mineral powder to the goddess while chanting. Hopefully will get the pics from Elin.

The receiving of my personal mantra. The participants who didn't have a personal mantra yet, received one from Mataji with a small ritual in the temple. I'm very happy with mine; amazing how well Mataji appears to know us after so short a period. The mantra is totally compatible. Sorry that I can't share it; it would lose its power...

The talent show. On the last evening in the ashram, there was a little show, high school style, where everyone who wanted could show off a skill. I did a bit of poi spinning (easy success with the glowing ones in the dark!), there was a pictionary game, and a self made mantra about Mataji that was made by Alice and Nora, very sweet and clearly much appreciated by the object of the song!! And last but not least there was a dead funny play with the story of Ram by Elin, Caroline, Nora and Pradeep. I laughed my ass off!!


There is probably more sensible things to say about the two weeks I spent there,but I have a hard time making truely profound comments sitting behind this 30 rupee an hour- computer screen. I started writing a fiction on my notebook that is of course based on what I'm experiencing, and I think it might prove to be a little less shallow than what you get here... so for the real fans, there is more to come, on paper.

Either way, thx for staying tuned,and godspeed!

Tinie x

Ashram, 9 en 10 augustus

Kopied from memory stick

Netala, 9 augustus

I am sitting in the bottom bunk bed in the room I share at the ashram. Name of the ashram: SivanandaKutir. Nearest town: Uttarkashi.

I am trying to gather my thoughts after nine intense, hard but rewarding days. Let’s start with a little background info.  This ashram was built by Swami Sivanada and after his death taken over by Swami Vishnu-Devananda. (The former  actually had a grave dug, went into it and then left his body consciously… a holy man indeed.) Swami Vishnu-Devananda, the second swami to run this place, was an amazing personality, who was sent by Sivananda to the West and got the TTC (teachers training course) organized, with all the centers and the networking that go with it. It’s probably safe to say that he is responsible for the  spreading of yoga practice all over the world. Feel free to correct me if I’m wrong. He’s also the one who flew over the Berlin Wall in the eighties (!!!). He was very committed to spreading the message of peace and unity in diversity, which I think is totally admirable. If only there were more people like him. The Swami leading the ashram today is a woman who combines girly sweetness with the kind of ‘severe but just’- attitude that becomes a good teacher. I like her.Mataji’s teachings are well-dosed, and lit up by her sense of humor and down-to-earth remarks and questions.

Now what does a day in the ashram look like?

At twenty past four (ranga danga ding dong!!) the first gong goes.

Ten to six the second gong, and at six we are expected freshly showered and dressed in the satsang hall for half an hour of meditating, half an hour of chanting and usually another half an hour of teaching (the story of the Mahabharatha and the Bhagavath Gita), concluded with the Arati. Arati is a chanted prayer, which includes a prayer for Mother Ganga. We sing it facing the river. After Arati we kneel before the altar and get Prasad, a small snack, usually a piece of fruit, or something sweet.

After the morning session we have some free time until half past seven. Then we get tea which is welcome on the empty stomach, believe me. We chat for a while and then get ready for the Asana class (yoga practice) which goes on from eight till about twenty to ten. After yoga we have just enough time to change quickly because at ten we get brunch, and usually they start early so better to be there five minutes to ten. The food is delicious, and we get as much as we can eat (losing weight might not really happen afterall ;)). Usually after fifteen minutes we’re done and then we rinse off the plates and cups and get to do our Karma Yoga(= selfless service). Basically everyone got an area in the ashram to sweep and mop. Once every other day I do laundry after I finished my Karma Yoga.

Afternoons are pretty much the same drill: at two we get a reading by Mataji (we discuss the Creation, the Aspects of Life, the meaning and purpose of Hatha Yoga etc), after that there’s tea, at four we get another session of Asana and at six dinner. At eight there’s Satsang again with meditation, chanting and Arati.

It seems horribly boring and quite an ordeal, and so it was the first couple of days. But every day it gets easier, the sore muscles got replaced by an eagerness to go further and further, the painful knees and back during  the Satsang are less present since the focus is more on the meditation, the empty stomach no longer disturbs, but is welcomingly accepted. I’m making great progress in yoga: almost succeeded in standing in headstand for over twenty seconds; legs got much more flexible. Just the getting up in headstand alone is thrilling! I’m really having fun with it.

More tomorrow, need some shut-eye now. Godspeed!

Greets Tinie

Netala, 10 augustus

Where were we? The daily routine in the ashram, right.

The morning Satsang is usually tough since sitting up straight in cross legged position for over half an hour when you’re half awake is obviously not easy. But it gets better as the days go by, and the routine has been interrupted by a long walk along the Ganges last Tuesday, a daytrip to Gangautri last Friday, and a walk uphill to a small Durga temple with an amazing view over the valley this morning. Be sure to check the pictures on FB.

The people we are dealing with here are the ten remaining members of an initial group of twenty. A bunch of guests took off because the experience either didn’t meet the expectations or was too hard on them. Part of the deal is that this is not about ‘enjoying oneself’, but about learning to be open to new and sometimes difficult situations… adjust, accomodate, bear insult, injury… anyway, there is ten of us left. In completely random order:

The French girl Gwen, whom I met in Haridwar at the bus stop. We share this dorm with the two of us so we had a chance to get closely acquainted. She turns out to be a smart, funny and strong person with a lot up her sleeve. She lived in Delhi for a couple of years, loves travelling, is a teacher, knows how to make her own clothes. She’s single and lives in Rennes, Bretagne.

The British girl Charlotte who sleeps in the dorm next door, all by herself now since the angry Indian lady and her daughter left. Charlotte is an architect who quit her job with ‘the creative psychopath’ of a boss she had. She can’t be older than twenty five. Fun to be around, easy to talk to, always in for a laugh but capable of serious reflexion too. She’s leaving us on Friday to travel around Rajastan with her boyfriend. Good for you, Charlotte!

The American girl Emily. She did the advanced TTC and knows so much of the chants by heart, I’m totally jealous. Haven’t really talked much so far but we exchange smiles :)

The Swedish girls Elin and Caroline. Maybe not doing them any justice naming them in one breath. Only recently getting to know them a little better. They also took the TTC and are rocking the Asana’s like pro’s. Elin seems to be very serious about this ashram experience, she’s intensely focused at all times. Caroline seems to be the more easy going one of the two. Either way I like them both, they’re just not very easy to approach because they are together a lot and not all that talkative. And believe it or not: neither am I around here!

The British girls Charlie and Alice. Charlie is a chattery, cheerful girl, always ready with a sweet smile or a comforting word. Although she’s all smiles most of the time I get this feeling that she’s probably more in need of a smile and a comforting word than any of us. I might be wrong ofcourse, but I have that experience with my students: usually the loudest, most funloving clowns are trying hard not to show their tears… Her friend Alice is  the more serious one. Looking for calm and balance, she said earlier today. She was actually about to leave when we had our first talk and I unintently persuaded her to stay, and I am so happy I did! Whenever I notice her enjoying the progress that she makes in yoga, it makes me a little bit happy too.

The German girl Nora. She’s also teaching back in Germany. Easy to talk to, fun to hang out with. We took a three-double dip in the Ganges last week. Freezing but sooo good. Unfortunately she got really sick after the trip to Gangautri and stayed in bed for about three days. She’s completely back and kicking now. Gooo, Nora!

The British guy Gregory. He’s a tall, thin man who keeps a bit to himself. He eats like a wolf and doesn’t seem to gain a gram. He’s totally wickedly good at yoga. And Mataji doesn’t understand his accent :)

The Indian guy Pradeep. His name means something like light. He’s a gentle, intelligent and funny man who can actually keep me listening, which is quite an achievement. Since he’s a little older he’s like the experienced teacher, but, so far, not smart-ass or pushy. I enjoy our conversations. The list of interesting Indians gets longer! It’s probably no coincidence that Pradeep  lives in Canada.

Hope I didn’t forget anyone. Ooh there’s the yoga teachers of course: Durga and Kalijani. And Kalesh. Durga and Kalijani are great teachers, fun to be around, easy to talk to. Kalesh I don’t know, he’s a bit of an outsider. He never attends any of the Satsangs or meals, and he didn’t introduce until I asked what his name was… funny birds sometimes these Indian dudes. I do get a liking to his teaching, since he gets  the progression just right; I can keep up but get a good work-out through the Asana’s all the same.

There, so far for the characters involved! So, Viki, to answer your question: no there’s no good looking interesting men around. And that’s just fine, honestly I think this is not the  place to have a fling, it would only distract me more and keep me from attaining the peace and  mental purification I am looking for.

As far as that mental purification is concerned, I’m not sure if that is ever going to happen. JS is still spooking around my head, not as frequently and intensely as before maybe, but still. Thoughts of him throw me off every time. And as for distraction: Akshay called me the other day and I asked him to join me in Rishikesh for a week or so. (Weak is the flesh, no ashram is gonna change that) He said he wanted to but had no money.  Still he promised to try and make it somehow. Not keeping my hopes up though. And I sure as hell won’t offer him to pay any of his expenses, been there done that! If he makes it on his own expense it means he really wants to be there. And if he doesn’t make it, then so be it. All the more time and space to focus on some serious yoga exercise. And moreover I am supposed to keep my heart clean and empty!

Next time some in-depth descriptions of my adventures in the ashram!

Godspeed dear readers,

Greets Tinie

Rishikesh, 30 juli

I'm on my own again! Said goobye to Edu and Athar in Jaipur, got on the night train and arrived in Haridwar around ten thirty in the morning. Usually there is fellow backpackers here and there, but this time: no one. But there was a crowd of Indians, Prashant was right: it's busy this time of the year. I found the bus station after getting myself a new sim-card (yes you can call me, my number can be requested through FB) but the buses only had signs in Hindi and no one spoke any English... with hands and feet, RISHIKESH?? was good enough, I figured it out. I usually do. And then I saw another backpack, a European looking woman who seemed to be just as lost as I had been minutes before. Gwen turned out to be French, and on her way to the same ashram I am going to! Funny how these things work here.

Now I'm in the hostel that is recommended by 'the book', it has a beautiful view over the river and a nice restaurant, which are pretty much the only things I need here. I am relaxing before the ride up north tomorrow, which is going to take seven hours. No sight seeing for me, thank you.

But something else. It's such a challenge for me to stay on my track and not get carried away by diversions... The diversion I am talking about right now is fortunately enough a sensible (and super sweet) person who has no intention what so ever to ruin this India-experience for me. I am also reminded of what happened last year in Nicaragua and strongly advised by the Tarot to stay on my own and look for my own path. Thanks Akshay for being so unbelievably awesome. Meeting you was like a rainshower in the desert. It was a refreshing reminder, as much as a wake up call. You won't be forgotten.

Udaipur, 28 juli

Udaipur, last stop in Rajastan. Well, almost, after this I am joining Eduardo up to Jaipur where I'll be taking a night train to Haridwar. And from there on to Rishikesh and Uttarkashi... Ashram here I come!
As far as Udaipur is concerned: it's probably the most touristy place in Rajastan so far. It reminds me a little bit of Essaouira in Morocco:  the shops and restaurants are just a little less shabby and sometimes even have designer furniture (!! discovered a batch of AWESOME vintage stairs on the roof top terrace of Maxim's near the temple, and they had NO IDEA what I was talking about. Sometimes I get really looked at as if I came from Mars or something) and occasionally they play Western music, which of course diminishes the authenticity but it feels more like home. Anyway, the City palace was breath taking and the lake is gorgeous. I took a boat tour just before sunset and it was well worth the 200 rupies. AND I met Dina, my new Israeli friend, which made the boat ride even more fun. Dina, if you read this: so glad we met!! You're totally welcome in Bruges if you ever make it!!
After the boat tour there was a dancing performance in the Bahore ki Haveli, a nice villa with an inside garden, with beautifully dressed women doing their traditional dances. Pics follow.
And after that I attended some singing and dancing in the biggest temple in town. There was a huge crowd in the temple for the festival, which goes on for a month. Akshay, the Indian guide who gave us the tour of the palace, told us to go and participate. And I liked it. Even though I am no Hindu and I obviously am an outsider, I felt welcome. The services in the temple are so different from what we are used to in the West. People are chatting, children playing, there's live music and clapping and chanting... and still it feels as sacred as it gets. People do their pooja (thx for the correction Deeksha!), the Brahmans perform their rituals. And I just sat and joined the singing. Afterwards I met Dina and we went for a beer at Maxim's. And we were so engaged in our conversation that we lost track of time and apparently after eleven there's no one in the streets anymore, not even a riksha. So we walked to the hotel where I'm staying, realizing there were basically only cows, stray dogs and wrong guys with scooters on the street, telling us 'we go fuck you'. Very entertaining but not really reassuring. And when we got at the hotel the door was closed, so I had to wake up poor Athar, the driver, to ask him to open the door. He must love the irresponsible redhead like crazy by now ;) Dina got driven to her hostel by one of the hotel guys, on his scooter. She survived, we had breakfast together this morning.
This afternoon Edu and I went for a swim in a fancy palace hotel, felt wonderfully refreshing but ever since I feel queezy and I have turista... it was gonna happen eventually so there we are... yay.
After this I'll see Akshay for dinner. The third Indian I meet so far who I can relate to and have a decent conversation with. Probably no coincidence he has a degree in arts and history and lived in Sydney for a while. And he's very easy on the eyes ;)
So I bid you farewell sweet reader. Stay tuned!

Love and godspeed,
Tinie

Jodhpur, 24 juli

Posting twice today! Last post was supposed to be put on line days ago, but there were some minor technical problems: wifi is not that common around here so I end up dragging the laptop around and using internetcafe's anyway... silly but what can you do.
Last you heard from me was from Pushkar, the city with the holy lake and the beautiful Brahma temple. We bumped in to some traditional musicians who performed beautifully, which, once again, made me cry :) Yeah I'm terrible, I'm not stopping anymore... but there is really too much beautiful and touching stuff around here, I can't help it!
We also climbed the Savitri temple hill, at the best time of the day of course; around two pm we reached the temple and by the time we were back down I was sunburnt sooo badly... I did it again. Much better now but shedding skin like a snake. Ieeeuw. In the city we met the musicians again, sitting at some tea place with some dude who was obviously not Indian. Later that day he turned out to be staying at our hotel and we had a long talk: he's riding through India on a motorbike. Sweet! And he's romanian,  born in Sebes, Transylvania! Which is like, miles away from Viscri where my dear dad bought a farm! We had quite some things to talk about and I kindov hope to meet him in Nepal at some point. Raz, when you read this: I'd love to hook up at some point! You understand! ;-)
After Pushkar followed Jaisalmer. Pretty much all there is to see is the big ass fortress that is basically the town centre which houses shops, families, restaurants, you name it. I had a waxjob (funny experience) just before we headed out to the desert to go on a camel safari. Sounds more exotic than it was, it's two hours on a camel, diner, sleeping under the stars (my favourite part) and breakfast. Sunrise and sunset were not really worth mentioning. I had fun eventhough it wasn't the most spectacular of daytrips. I met a young Danish guy, Frederik, who was the perfect pal to hang out with; he was alone, I was alone, we kept eachother company and we turned out to have the love for music in common. Ever heard of Hudson Mohawke? Well neither had I until I met Fred and I'm glad he made me listen to Freek cuz it totally made me smile (not cry, sorry).
Thanks for the nice company Freddy. I'm adding you on soundcloud as we speak.. Listening will be for next time... promise.
After the camel safari we hopped back in the car and drove to here, and Jodhpur is so endearing. It has a fortress that is more impressive than the other fortresses so far, and a labyrinth of little streets to get lost in, lovely. Earlier I was invited in the house of a family and had tea and some fried stuff I forgot the name of, and they were just super nice and honored to have me in their little house... it's almost embarrassing how sweet these people are, they would seriously kiss your feet if you'd let them. No kidding. And the kids running behind you asking your name, begging for a 'school pen please', and loving to be in pics with you, no charge!!
Ok, my dear readers, so far for today. I'm sweaty and smelly and I want to get freshened up for dinner: the musicians I met up in the fortress invited me to have diner with them and Liesbeth Naessens, a Belgian musician who happens to be in town working with them. Nice huh! I am looking forward to it, these musicians seemed like such interesting and friendly people. Report will follow.

Much love and godspeed,
Tinie

Pushkar, 20 juli
Here I am, chilling and relaxing in a wonderful restaurant called 'a blue star', owned by an Israeli girl who ran into her husband on her first india trip and never got away again. Reeeeally. It was obvious there was something different about this place, there's loungy fusion music playing and the setup looks lush rather than scruffy as most average inexpensive Indian places do.
I'm gonna do this one in reverse because i have no idea where I left off: I did some attempts in cyber cafés to continue the story but I never actually got to post anything. Now I am unable to go online so I can't check what I wrote last... anyway.

Today I had the most wonderful experience at the lake of Pushkar. Around the lake are steps (ghat) where people sit and pray or go into the water to bathe and get the 'pooja'. The pooja is the blessing from the god that is worshipped in the particular temple or 'ghat' (stairs), in this case Brahma. Outside of the temple I received a string of dark pink roses and some roses for the offering (check the pics once i got to post them, you can see the woman who gave me the flowers) and once I went in a Brahman took me under his wings and took me through the pooja ritual. There were hundreds of pigeons flying over the water and the ghat, the breeze was wonderfully soothing and this general atmosphere of prayer altogether completely overwhelmed me. At some point repeating the impossibly long and strange sounding mantra's the brahman was saying, I just started crying. Yes my dear Prashant, India gets me even more emotional than I usually am. There was no stopping to it, I was reminded of the people back home, especially of the one person I so dearly love but left behind with the clear intention of moving on with my life, and the tears just poured out. Pawan, the brahman, asked if anyone died. Well, not exactly, but it probably hurts as much. Sitting near the holy water, I could almost feel the arms of Brahma holding me, reassuring me everything was gonna be ok. Once again, come and experience it, there is nothing like it. I threw the flowers into the water, held the sacred coconut, threw some stuff that Pawan put onto the coconut behind me and I felt a lot better:)

I'll spare you guys the rest: it's pretty much all bazaars and sweet people, beautiful colours and characters, the pics pretty much speak for themselves. Maybe worth mentioning anyway is my travel companion Eduardo, the Spanish guy I got hooked up with by Shaffi, the tour operator in Delhi who sold me this Rajastan tour. Eduardo is a twenty two year old economy student from Jerez de la Fronteira, who is experiencing India for the first time too. He's very unlike me, gets angry when people are 'dishonest' (basically trying to get the most money out of a transaction) and has no clue whatsoever what I am talking about half of the time. But none the less we have some good laughs and get along pretty well. Shaffi's romantic idea of this young puppy (who might even still be a virgin, he claims he never had a girlfriend) and me getting together is pretty absurd. Everything might be possible in India but there's limits to miracles :)
So speaking of romance; you guys are probably wondering whatever happened with that attractive young director I met in Delhi, Rudradeep. Well, I'm afraid you'll be disappointed ;). He picked me up at New Delhi station when I got back from Jaipur. It was around eleven and since he is staying at a family's house and doesn't have his own key, he couldn't stay. So we basically said hi, I got in a riksha and we said bye again. Bummer. I had to get a hold of Shaffi to find out in which hotel I was staying (hooray for Shaffi's clear organising), but the office was already closed (ofcourse, at eleven in the evening, na-uh) and guess what, I didn't find his card. Finally after emptying by bag i found back the voucher and the envelope had his nrs on it. But my Belgian phone wouldn't connect! I got desperate, even tried calling Rudra to ask if i could stay over but my phone wouldn't connect either, so that didn't help. In the end i just asked a random stranger if i could use his phone and finally got Shaffi, who told me where i was staying. After getting to the wrong hotel, more phonecalls, angry hotel managers and electricity beakdowns I finally got a room and I slept well for the first time. After leaving Rudra a message telling him to meet me the next day at the bar where we met. To make a long story short: he didn't show up, i left the bar, went back to the hotel for a nap and got a wake up call ten mins before I was leaving to Pushkar. And guess who was sitting there in the lobby waiting for me: Rudra. Just in time to say goodbye. That's pretty much all we do, saying goodbye. So far for Rudra: he has my number and doesn't really seem eager to stay in touch anyway so whatever. Another shady cat with very unclear intentions, I might aswell be glad it just didn't work out. There! Rudra, if you are reading this: you seem like the kind of guy I could totally hang out with, but how on earth do you want me to trust a flake like yourself? I'm a sweet and patient girl but hey, seriously. Not liking how it went down.
　

Delhi, 19 juli

Yesterday I visited Jaipur in a zombie state. Amber palace almost killed me, climbing that hill under the burning sun wasn't exactly my idea of fun. I did it anyway ( I'm a good tourist) and zombied around the palace for maybe twenty mins. After the visit Janu understood how bad I felt, and he basically just drove me around. A shamelessly shallow way of exploring a beautiful city like Jaipur but hey, I felt like crap so there. I got lured into some textile selling place where they had all this marvellous stuff so I spent another months budget on things I don't need. I'm helping Indian economy! (Blush)

In the train on the way back to ND I was sitting beside a smart and nice guy, we had a super nice conversation. He lived in the States for a while, is a computerguy. Exactly what I had guessed, he didn't look like your average Indian guy.